A nurse at the Metro San Antonio Pediatric Care Facility kindly informed Sharely Browning that her 2 month old baby girl's apparent smile was actually just an unthinking, physiological reaction to indigestion and gas.
"I was so relieved", explained Browning afterwards, "I've been hoping [Dana] would turn out to be a repulsive, gaseous little bitch. I couldn't be more proud!"
Dana drank 3.5 ounces of formula and passed out for the remainder of the morning and was therefore unavailable for comment.
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